Less

I want to reach out
take it
I want to remember
what it felt like
but I've danced too long
staring at shades of grey
no longer recognizing the life
behind the lies
trying to survive
instead of living
instead of believing
I have to prepare
hold my ground
whether holding back
or holding on
I cannot differentiate any longer
but place myself
in the line of fire
compare myself to everything
and tell me it all
amounts to less
than nothing