last

pulled back
from the reverie
to the reality
I'm still searching
still holding out
for the little things
with nothing left
to live on
I will make it
stretch it out
over time
and pull myself over
the finish line
even if I finish
last

parade

each and every
time
I run myself
in circles
making strides to find
what I so longed for
seeking out
mere moments
from which to draw upon
there hasn't been
a time yet
that I haven't
arrived
to watch someone else
find the happiness
that faltered in me
my hands itch to reach out
my heart aches with need
and the scene plays out
the parade
passes through
each and every
time

cry.

I can hear your
silent strangled cries
only because
I know them so
personally
they ache in me
they resonate
I can feel your
hot tears pouring
only because
I see the trails
Lost at night
awake and swirling
winding
searching for peace
searching for sleep
we follow
the cry.

Negative.

you can't raise it any higher
you can't find the higher truth
you can't sell me any secrets
you can never try and soothe
the aches I've been achieving
the lows I have soared
the wonders I have turned from
the lack of any wards

I'm open to suggestions
but you can't take away my drug, my pain
in seeking some asylum
I have found the pain again

Its all my prerogative
It's up to me
If I want to be negative
If I can't break free
they tell me its just shadows
left behind from spring
but I see through them
I see everything

Every eye has turned upon me
and then swiftly turned away
something horrible and tragic
and I know just what they say
I can't hear the comments made
but I feel it in the tone
all the cuts and scratches open
it goes right to the bone

And I am open to suggestion
but they're gonna come in vain
I was seeking an asylum
in the rhythm of the pain

Its all my prerogative
It's up to me
If I want to be negative
If I can't break free
they tell me its just shadows
left behind from spring
but I see through them
I see everything
I see everything...

waiting

i want to say
i don't understand
why
that i don't know
what brought you
to that place
and everyday
i live in fear
of finding
that path
waiting for me

old and tired.

I tried
sometimes they don't
believe it
but
I tried
and failed
but lately
they still push me
like a stubborn cow
back into the pen
and I buck the
buck the system
the riders
and fight
nothing, and no one
only me
against
me
but my feeble attempts
only serve
to make me feel
old
and
tired.